Over the summer, I came to love the show Criminal Minds. The main characters are all fascinating, and they work so well together; the storylines are always new and horrifying (in a good way; it's a show about serial killers...). But one of the lines that they have repeated throughout the show's 6+ season run really struck me: "Hope can be paralyzing." Now, I get where they are coming from. For a parent of an abducted child to keep hoping, after years and years without a lead, that their child is still alive can have a paralyzing affect on that parent. But I don't think that it's hope itself that is paralyzing. It's letting yourself become obsessed with, and yes paralyzed by, the notion that what you want could come true. And it's believing that, somehow, you standing still and just agonizing over this possibility is going to bring your desires to fruition. If that is what you call hope, then, yes, hope is paralyzing.
But I'm coming to realize something entirely apart from that notion: hope isn't a feeling, it's not a thought or a want or a desire. Instead, hope is tangible. Hope springs from faith, from trust, and from a true knowledge and understanding of who Jesus Christ is and what that means for you. This kind of hope could never be paralyzing. It can only be freeing.
I honestly believe this. But that doesn't mean that I'm there yet. I don't yet have this tangible thing called hope. I'm not yet free. On a daily basis, I'm struggling with depression and with feeling like there's no hope. I want so badly to get there, to not just know but also feel this hope.
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